


Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap

by TheEndsongAbyssXV



Category: Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind, Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Genre: Crimes & Criminals, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Family Drama, M/M, Multi, Murder, Neloth is an absolute dick and we love him anyway, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn, The Dragonborn doesn't give a single fuck about saving the world, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Underage Drinking, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, new world order
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-01
Updated: 2019-04-30
Packaged: 2020-02-10 15:25:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18663127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheEndsongAbyssXV/pseuds/TheEndsongAbyssXV
Summary: Life can be boring, difficult and tedious. Life can be exhilarating, dangerous and wonderful. Or it could be all the above; it depends on who you make the journey with and where you go. Let me tell you about the adventures I went on with the Dovahkiin. Let me tell you how the alleged savior of the world single-handedly almost got me killed by trying to save my life.





	Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap

The air was thick with ash, and the wind was hot. The fluffy gray stuff covered the ground like a blanket; inches thick here, a few feet there, no matter where you looked, it was all over the place, and it was getting worse. The city was not much farther away, and had to get there before nightfall. Seven or eight miles wasn't too bad, right? Cliff racers soared overhead, and in the distance, the dim blue glow of a betty netch could be seen against the dusty air. Since Red Mountain had erupted, Morrowind had changed. The Grazelands were no longer full of lush green fields and crystal rivers, the Ascadian Isles had dried up and were as ruined and bleak as Foyada Mamaea. The wastelands in the northern part of Vvardenfell were the same, dark, dry and full of monsters. The lava veins around Red Mountain were unchanged, full of high rocky cliff faces and cave systems. The interior of the crater was full of ruined Citadels from Dagoth Ur's reign from two-hundred years ago. The enchanted fence that once surrounded the volcano was broken, large cracks running through the hard glass, and holes in some places were blight-infected beasts had broken through. The wind picked up, stinging any skin it came and contact with, and with a curse and a burst of speed, the adventurer was able to duck out from behind a dead silt strider and ran towards the cliffs, eyes locked onto the half broken door built into the side. An abandoned mine, judging from the map, but monsters were better than running the risk of suffocating on ash or falling into one of the lava streams. With a roar of wind, the ash had formed a twister, which split in two, and gathered speed, one headed towards the foyada, the other straight towards Ghostgate. _There is no way I am making it to Ald'Ruhn tonight. Hopefully tomorrow the skies will be clear. I can make it to Vivec by Sundas if I leave as soon as the ash storm lets up._

"Okay, Tédien, you can do this-!" With a mighty leap, hands grappled for purchase on the rocks and a vulgar curse left her mouth. She pulled herself up, a twinge of pain throbbing in her ankle as she stood and ran along the cliff edge towards the door a few meters ahead. The wind was so strong it made her wobble, and Tédien ducked into the rocks and used every ounce of power in her body to get across the small gap in the cliff to get to the door. As her body slammed painfully into the sharp ground, she swore, "I completely misjudged the height of that jump…"

The door was two feet above her, but her ankle was hurting something fierce, and the she was almost blind from the ash. It clung to her armor, her skin, it coated her mouth. She hiked her satchel higher up on her back and dug her steel-covered boot into a small crack in the wall, pulling herself up towards the little rocky platform and grabbing onto the door handle like it would help her. With a surge of annoyance, Tédien pulled herself up and dipped into the mine with a sigh of relief. The door was off its hinges, but she was able to prop it up and hold it in place with heavy rocks so it wouldn't collapse and let the ash in. The air was chilly, and sweat bloomed onto her skin as she sat down on the hard dirt floor. It had been a mine at once point, the bowels of which had been a Sixth House base, in honor of Dagoth Ur. She tried to remember the stories her grandparents had told her of Morrowind, when Vvardenfell had been in its prime. She was exhausted, hungry and filthy, but figured exploring a little would be a good thing. Then she could find somewhere to rest. Tédien rolled her ankle, luckily it wasn't swollen or broken, though it was tender to walk on. Wind howled outside, and the door shook as one of the miniature tornadoes came closer. Tédien walked down the path, looking at the broken lanterns that hung along the ceiling, some newer, but all older than her twenty-three years. Broken crates and barrels littered the mine, along with old rusted wagons, some still holding chunks of ore. Tédien gave a gasp of delight at the small dirty sack hidden partially beneath a clump of ebony; it was a coin purse. Heavy, and hopefully with enough money to keep her fed for a few days. Maybe she could even splurge and stay at an inn. Not one of the lavish one where the pillows and blankets are filled with feathers like in Cyrodiil, a simple hole-in-the-wall would work.. She hadn't slept on a bed in over three months with all the traveling she'd been doing. But she was on a mission, she had something important to do. And only a short time to do it.

Tédien walked farther down, careful not to hit her head on sharp, low hanging rocks and broken shafts. Empty bottles and food containers were littered here and there, leaving no doubt the place had been used before, either by bandits or someone like herself who simply needed a safe place to spend the night or escape the weather. It was so dark though, and Tédien didn't want to draw attention to herself by using magic, just in case someone or something unfriendly hid within the mine. She kept going, walking through the cave. There were only two tunnels, and she had explored the left one, which came to a dead end full of bones and animal scraps. There had been mining equipment too, broken and rusted from years of disuse. The air was heavy with the scent of earth, moist and warm, and Tédien sighed, wiping sweat from her face. It wasn't as bad as outside, but she hated heat. There was a crunching sound, and Tédien abruptly froze, hand going for her dagger. She preferred to avoid conflict if she could, but if she was jumped by bandits, she might not have a choice. Suddenly, she could hear voices, and she frowned.

"An' so I said to 'er, 'bitch, I ain't got no more gold!' And she starts throwin' a fit!"

"What did you do?"

There was a deep laugh, "I put the whore in her place. Taught her how a woman should act with her man." there was another laugh, and a half-hearted moan. "Had a nice little make up session after that."

Tédien frowned. Two thugs. And one was an Orc, she could tell by the accent. The other was definitely a human man, not of the Mer species, but until she saw his face, she couldn't tell. I need to get out of here. Spinning on her heel, she turned to walk back up the path she'd come from, but a nervous jitter went through her and she stumbled, knocking into a cluster of brooms and fishing poles that had been standing against the wall. They fell, and within the silence of the cave, crashed like thunder.

"What was that?" "Over there!" Tédien reached for the wooden rafters above her head; maybe if she his above them in the dark, they'd leave and she could escape! A gasp left her mouth as something latched onto her bruised ankle just as she started to pull herself up, and on instinct she slammed her other, steel covered foot down hard, into the face of the Orc who'd grabbed her. His grip loosened, and she scrambled away, kicking up dirt as she ran. Pain lanced through her ankle and foot, but she ran harder, stopping only when an arrow landed a few feet ahead of her. These bastards were serious! Tédien dipped into a small alcove to her left, dagger drawn, crouching low. Footsteps met her ears and as one of her assailants charged past, she swung the blade, the tip slicing into the heel, and the man swore as he stumbled, and Tedien chose that moment to kick him in the face, hard enough to knock him out, but the Orc had gone berserk and was thrashing around, axe held high. Blessing the Nine for making her a bard, Tédien pulled two scrolls from her bag and unleashed their fury, the Storm Atronachs roaring as they charged the Orc. She didn't wait to see how the battle ended, and took off back to towards the entrance, but the boom of thunder and angry cries made her stop. Had her conjurations been beaten? She was too exhausted to fight, didn't want to. She would, but she had something to do-!

"Oh, great." One of the atronachs blundered up the path, crackling with electricity. It stood there for a few seconds before dissolving. She had to make sure, though, and ran off towards the room the bandits had been in, stopping as she saw the sizzling remains of the Orc, and the unconscious form of the, yep it was an Imperial, like her. Well, half of her. Her mother had been a Nord, her father an Imperial. She mumbled to herself as the steps suddenly dropped down, her heart racing as she missed two of them. She stopped and sat down, exhaustion getting the better of her. She listened to the wind, the creak of the wooden door, the soft tinkle of water from below-

"Water?" She surged up, thirst gripping her like a vice, and she ran down the corridor, careful not to make too much noise in case someone or something had also sought shelter in the cave. Bones from scavengers were littered everywhere. Rats, a human skull, the horns of a Nix-Hound. But the water was louder now, and Tédien was like a bee who had sensed honey, speed walking through the darkness. "Ah-ha!" There it was, nestled in the corner. According to her books, the foyada had lots of hidden caches where vegetation grew, and though she didn't see any grass or plants, she had a small reservoir of water. It ran down the wall and dripped off of the smoother rocks, into a crevice in the ground. It was probably full of contaminates, but a good boiling would remedy that, and if she did get sick, Tédien was well equipped with potions. Pulling out her dagger, she used its light enchantment to create a dim glow for her to see.

Gathering three bottles of water, Tédien stripped, dropping her dirt-crusted chitin armor to the ground and pulling out a bar of sload soap she'd found in an old shack in Gnisis a few days ago. It smelled of jasmine, and she inhaled its perfume before dousing herself in the surprisingly cold water. But given how hot it had been outside, she welcomed the chill, washing the remains of blood and dirt from her skin. It stung at the small cuts, but at least she'd be clean; she never knew how long it would be until she'd bathe again, and though she tried to be as clean as possible, Tédien couldn't help it if she were attacked and got covered in blood, of slipped and fell into the dirt. She pulled her hair from its bun, allowing the red-brown layers to fall to her shoulders. She soaked her scalp, digging her short blunt nails in and cleaning vigorously. She wasn't a neat freak by any means, but when she needed to be cleaned, she made sure not a single particle of filth touched her. She caught her reflection in the water from her blade, and she sighed. _That damn Scamp got me good._

She eyed the claw mark across the left side of her face. It would scar for sure. Three gashes from above her ear to the corner of her mouth. The little bastard had surprised her while she was exploring an old Daedric ruin near Gnisis, jumping from above and landing on her shoulder, raking its claws over her armor and skin. She'd lit it on fire, and it had run off. Only to return a day later, following her around. Tédien looked over to the corner, where the small creature stood, hunched and swaying slightly. It hadn't left her alone. He was smaller than other Scamps, a runt, probably a few months old, and big enough to fit inside one of her satchels, and probably had been abandoned. But Tédien didn't have the heart to kill it, and figured it would leave after a while. Nope.

"Oi, Scamp."

"Haaaa?" the creature swung towards her a little, babbling. "Breflik?"

Tédien rolled her eyes. She hadn't named the creature, hadn't wanted to, but now that it was her forced companion (she'd tried leaving it in a field once, but it had followed her by scent and tracked her two miles away), she felt he needed a name. I am eighty percent sure it's male, but… Sometimes you just can't tell! She finished rising the soap from her hair and body, grabbing a soft clean robe from her satchel and wrapping the dark blue fabric around her body. Her brown eyes tracked the scamp as it snuck around the small room, digging into the dirt and pulling grubs into its greedy little mouth. Tédien threw her armor into the small pool of water, letting it soak, and hoping she could clean it later on. She dug into her bag again, pulling out two shiny red apples, one of which she bit into with a loud crack, the juice dripping off of her hand and rolling down to her elbow.

"Breflik?" the scamp had wandered over to her and began sniffing at her food. Tédien pulled away, frowning.

"No."

"Hawoo!" Tédien continued to eat her apples, watching as the scamp walked around, digging or yelling at some unseen force in whatever language it was speaking.

"Breflik!" it screeched. "Habawwwga!"

"Is that your name?" Tédien tossed the two cores at it. "Or just a word you know in whatever language you're speaking?" The scamp turned to face her, head cocked. She called it again, and it responded, creeping towards her in a savage manner but abruptly rubbed its head against her arm affectionately, making strange little noises. The scamp began to creep again, ignoring her and looking for helpless insects to devour. Tédien watched him for a bit, before relaxing against the wooden planks against the wall. _I'll journey to Ald'Ruhn as soon as I wake up, and then I'll head to Vivec…take a ship to Gnaar Mok…go to…Hammerfell from there…_ She yawned, closing her eyes and allowing the sweet inky void of sleep to claim her.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_The air was hot, dry, and the heat swarmed her from all sides. Cursing and cries of pain could be heard in the distance; a man hollering for people to aid him, a woman calling out for help._

_"My children!" she screamed. "They're trapped!"_

_"Mama!" Tédien answered, but the smoke made her cough, and her eyes watered and stung. Arms wrapped around her and lifted her tiny body up towards the stairs, and Tédien screamed as a burning plank fell from the rafters above her head and slammed down not a foot away from her. Their home was a general good store, with three levels; basement and storage which had a cellar door that opened outside, the first/main floor that was the shop itself, and then the top floor which held the kitchen, bedrooms and bath._

_All of which was on fire._

_"Go through the roof and run," her brother ordered, and Tédien whimpered, fear swamping the ten-year-old. "It's okay, I'll be right there,"_

_Oh, but Tédien didn't want to be alone. There were bandits outside, and the fuckers were having a party, throwing empty ale bottles at people and brandishing whatever weapons they had. Two women had been taken already, and one man had been killed, and Tédien, child she may be, knew what it would mean for her to go outside alone._

_"But Mama and Papa-" her voice cracked as she coughed, and her brother gave her a kiss on the forehead, pushing her farther up and towards the balcony._

_"Just run, lass!" another voice yelled, and Tédien watched as her father swung his enchanted saber at the door, cutting down the planks so she could get out. "And you go too, boy!"_

_Tédien gasped as her brother lifted her into his arms and shoved her up the stairs, watching as her parents scrambled to keep the bandits out of the shop._

…

Tédien woke to the feeling of small hands on her leg, and she shifted her body to kick out when she dimly remembered she wasn't alone. Her eyes shot open as the baby scamp prodded her body, its breathy gasps reaching her ears. Instantly she was awake, alert. Normally the scamp was quiet, curled up in her knapsack and waiting for her to wake up, because it was nocturnal and was up all night.

Not this time.

It was scratching at her now in earnest, and Tédien frowned, sitting up and allowing the baby scamp to climb up her body and onto her shoulder, where it dug its small hands into her hair and scalp. Not to hurt, but to hold on. She quickly gathered her belongings, and snatched her armor (which she'd left out to dry) up and quickly snapped the Netch leather in place, sheathing her Daedric dagger in its holster, and drawing her satchel on her back.

"What's wrong?" she whispered, and the scamp growled, tail swishing and it looked left, staring at some unseen force. It smelled or heard something Tédien couldn't, and that's when she remembered: the bandit. She hadn't killed one of them, simply knocked him out, and now he was up and walking around, which meant he would no doubt come across the remains of his friend.

She saw the glow of a torch to the side, and she stared at the flames, until the scamp hissed and dug its nails into her head with a  _hi-how-are-ya_? She snapped to reality and took off then, bare feet moving silently over dirt and rocks, and she clutched the baby scamp like a child, close to her chest, and blocking it from view. Thunder roared in the distance and Tédien almost swore out loud. First it was ash storms, now it was rain. Morrowind was a cesspool of weather and disease, and she wanted out. But first, she had to get out of the abandoned mine without dying.

The scamp snarled abruptly and Tédien barely had time to react as a wooden club with nails in it swung at her head. She dropped down low, her preservation instincts taking over and she swung a leg out, clipping the man off balance so he landed on his ass. But it lasted only a moment and he was up, swinging at Tédien like he was trying to knock her head off her shoulders, which in fact, he was.

The scamp got ghost then, scrambling up the rocky wall and hiding in a small crevice. The thing was small, about the size of a newborn baby, maybe an inch to two larger, much smaller than the average newborn scamp, and it concealed itself completely, which was good, because Tédien was about to put the whammy on the bandit bastard and didn't want the scamp hurt.

As the bandit cursed at her, Tédien swung out another leg towards his crotch and his face went all  _oh-no-you-don't!_  and he evaded the attack, which caused Tédien to slip onto her back, and like she knew he would, the bandit was on her, sitting on her hips and hands going around her throat, but just as fast, her hands circled his wrists, electricity dancing between her fingers and arcing up his arms and no doubt into his body. The man groaned and rolled off of her, twitching but still very much alive. She scrambled to get up but his hand closed around her wrist and yanked her down, her jaw clamping together and stars bursting in front of eyes and her tongue and teeth met.

The bandit clambered over her, heading towards where the scamp was, shrieking from the higher rocks on the cliff wall. He swung his club, but missed, and Tédien stood, swallowing a mouthful of blood, unsheathing her dagger and driving it home into the back of the Imperial's thigh. The artery was severed and dark blood dribbled from the wound at an alarming speed, during which the man fumbled and moaned, trying to plug the injury with his fingers and only making it worse, blood arcing out onto the rocks.

Tédien reached for the scamp, who all but flew into her arms, resuming its perch on her shoulder and neck before she booked it, just in case there were more ruffians she didn't see last night and may come after them.

Luckily, she'd be long gone.

Her amulet of Almsivi began glowing, and the moment she breached the door, her molecules scattered and took form in the courtyard of the Tribunal temple in Tel Branora.

…

Tédien hit the ground and the landing made her stumble. Her heart was pounding, and her neck was sore; no doubt she'd have bruises later. The scamp was crawling up her body again and onto her shoulder, where it made cute little noises and sniffed the air. A cliff racer (Tédien glared at the thing) was flying overhead, but didn't seem too interested in them, and she was grateful because she had to get inside and lay down before she passed out. Hear head was swimming from hitting the floor, and her jaw was aching something fierce.

The ruins of Tel Branora, an old Telvanni tower, was still in pretty decent shape, the lower tower barricaded with Daedric walls and sharp tree stalks. The upper tower had been completely repaired, and as Tédien took a gulp of her levitation potion and headed up to the door (wizards didn't use stairs in Morrowind), she caught sight of Draven, a Dunmer mage she'd met in Vivec two years ago. He held open the door, and a dark haired brunet made an appearance, and Tédien smiled at the twin Breton archers who had claimed the tower and offered it as a safe haven for anyone who needed it.

"How are things?" Tédien asked, touching down, smiling as Draven frowned at the scamp.

"All is well," his gravelly voice was softer than usual, and Tédien caught sight of the other inhabitants, an Almer female and her young son, three Orcs who had been found dying along side the road near Ald'Ruhn and had been rescued by Ti'ij, the Khajiit healer that Tédien knew through Draven. Everyone had their own reason for being here in the middle of nowhere, but mostly because it was safe, compared to how life would be if they were back home.

"I come bearing gifts," Tédien said, pulling out her satchel. Gra-Shobal, the female Orc, smiled as she was handed a stack of books about weaponry, and Ti'ij was gleeful over medicinal supplies he was given.

"You're filthy," Soren, the darker haired Breton said with a grin, pointing out the dirt, sweat and blood on her clothes and skin. His brother, Saedrik, was quiet as he examined the scamp, which Draven was still glaring at.

"Tédien," the Dunmer turned to her, stroking his beard and leaning against the doorframe to the tower's barracks. "Care to explain the Daedra?"

Tédien collapsed into one of the hammocks and closed her eyes, explaining that the thing was harmless and thought of her as its mother. She faked a yawn, and Draven excused himself as the creature in question curled up against Tédien's chest. She wasn't tired, she was energized, and as she ran her hands through her mahogany colored hair, she dimly wondered what would have happened if she hadn't got out of the cave and the bandit had caught her.

_My mission would be incredibly more difficult than it already is._

...

Several hours later, into the night, Tymaen, the young high-elf boy, was stroking the fire in the corner, and Tédien watched wearily. The kid had no idea what he was doing and Tédien knew it was only a matter of time before he hurt himself or someone else. Luckily his mother (an ex-highborn Telvanni assassin) put the kibosh on the kids' weak attempt at magic and the boy sulked as Draven put out the fire altogether.

"So," his voice was soft, rough, and Tédien knew what was coming, so she turned her eyes to her friend. "Did you accomplish your mission?"

"I'm not going to be able to get to Hammerfell from here," she replied. "I'll have to cut through Black Light, to Skyrim and then go from there."

Draven watched the young half-breed (which is what anyone with mixed blood was called) for a while as she studied her hands, lips moving silently in what was no doubt a well rehearsed plan to get to Hammerfell.

"Isn't your brother in Skyrim?" he asked, and Tédien nodded, saying he was, but she didn't know where. Abruptly her emotional grid changed, and the Dunmer mage sifted through her mind with his telepathic gifts. Not too deep, just enough to see what had caused the wave of sadness in the woman. Her parents were long gone, having perished in a house fire more than a decade ago, when Tédien was just a child, but she and her brother had escaped. The last time she'd seen or heard from him was nearly four years ago, and Tédien had come to accept the fact that her sibling may also be dead, but there was a small glimmer of hope that she wasn't alone in the world.

"In any case, get some rest. If you plan on leaving tomorrow or the next day, you surely will need a good night's sleep." Tédien mumbled something incoherent, and Draven took his leave, ushering Tymaen out as well so as not to further disturb her.

_Damn it all!_  she cursed, feeling a surge of anger. Why was the responsibility thrown on her? Why did  _she_  have to be the one to travel from place to place to deliver the package? Tédien dug through her knapsack, pulling out a thick bundle that shimmered slightly. Enchanted to ward off those who would open it. Only the intended recipient could loosen the strings that held the iron mesh sack.

Not that she tried to, nope. Not once.

With a sigh of mingled frustration and exhaustion, Tédien closed her eyes, listening as her scamp prowled around the room and chattered to itself. 

**Author's Note:**

> Read and review, please! Questions, comments, concerns, whatever you fancy. OC submissions can be mailed to RainbowPearlVocie1594@gmail.com.


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